Thursday, July 30, 2009
Thank God For My Mom, Sisters and Friends!
I was recently diagnosed with Barrett's Esophagus. Being that Spouse is the world's worst worrier, I decided to wait to tell him about it until my doctor and I finished the tests to determine a prognosis. This past Monday I saw my gastroenterologist to follow-up on my first endoscopy at the end of May. He'd provided me with interesting photos of my innards at the time. I brought them along so that he could explain them in more detail and layman's English. He then told me he needed to do another endoscopy to get deeper tissue biopsies. The unnerving thing is that he suggested doing it the next morning. Being one who likes to get things over-with, I agreed. Only after I got home did I start wondering why the rush. Spouse freaked when I told him about it. His first reaction was that the doctor wanted to make money. [Gee, thanks for your concern, honey!] Part of the blame for his reaction is mine because I'd kept him in the dark about the previous endoscopy results. As the volume and pitch in his voice rose I confessed that my diagnosis was troubling, but treatable. [Didn't lower the volume much.] To add to Spouse's consternation, he would have to drive me home following the procedure. He hates to drive which usually is fine because I love to drive. Concerns about my low blood pressure in recovery surely were eliminated on that ride home! He was so anxious, he forgot to take his foot off the brake pulling up the incline from the GWU Hospital entrance. Couldn't figure out why the car wasn't moving . . . Laughter is said to be the best medicine. I agree with that. However, trying to force laughter from someone who is beside himself with worry is really tiring. I knew I was marrying a pessimist all those years ago and thought my optimism would help balance the relationship. It has -- to a degree. Being perky and pretending that everything will be OK eventually takes a toll. If it wasn't for the support of my sisters, Mom and friends I might consider taking a leap off of Key Bridge!! [No, please don't call the suicide hot-line! I'm probably the last person who'd actually go through with it! Just venting . . .]